Start Where You Are: The Power of Self-Reflection
- Jennifer McNeil
- May 13
- 4 min read
Updated: May 22
“The journey into self-love and self-acceptance must begin with self-examination. Until you take the journey of self-reflection, it is almost impossible to grow or learn in life.” — Iyanla Vanzant
A Lot Has Changed!
A lot has changed for me in the last five years. At times, it felt like one thing after another, each with life-changing consequences.
For me, it meant facing a new way of life without the people I was once surrounded by. If you’d asked me whether this is where I thought I’d be at 50 and change... I would have hoped not.
But here I am, making the adjustments I need to. It hasn’t been easy. There were times I had to dig deep. To ask myself: Why did this happen? And what do I need to learn to move forward?
It took a lot of self-reflection. A lot of inner conversations. And in the background of every thought… whispers of discontent, misalignment — the kind that leaves you feeling unsettled.
Then, I went away for a month. I meditated. I spent time on a secluded beach — just me and my notepad. I listened to the waves. Watched the colours of the sea shift with the sunset.
And I wrote.
That’s when it finally hit me!
I want to return to the Jen who supported others. I’ve come full circle.
But this time, I also needed space to heal, to grow, and to be the person I’ve always wanted to be. Not the one who constantly put everyone else’s feelings ahead of my own.
It took me a while to get here. Thirty years, maybe. But I’m here now. And I couldn’t have done it without giving myself space to breathe.
Self-reflection is one of the most powerful things we can give ourselves.
Don’t underestimate its importance when it comes to moving forward — with intention, with conviction, and with peace.
What Is Self-Reflection?
Self-reflection is the quiet pause we rarely give ourselves. It’s looking inward, honestly, not to judge, but to understand. It’s sitting with your thoughts, your patterns, your choices… and asking: What’s really going on here?
In a world that moves fast and expects more, self-reflection is a chance to slow down and reconnect with yourself. Before you can move forward, it helps to know where you’re starting from.
It’s the foundation of all meaningful growth because real change doesn’t come from running; it comes from returning.
And yet, many people avoid it. Why?
Because it can be uncomfortable. It asks us to be real, to listen to the parts of ourselves we’ve learned to ignore.
But here’s the truth:
Everything you want to change, heal, or become… starts here.
10 Gentle Truths About What Self-Reflection Can Offer
When you make self-reflection part of your routine — whether through journaling, a walk in nature, coaching conversations or a few quiet minutes to yourself, things start to shift. You begin to hear yourself more clearly.
Here’s what it can unlock:
1. Clarity and direction
You stop spinning and start listening. Instead of chasing what looks good, you ask: What feels right for me?
2. Emotional balance
Reflection creates space between feeling and reacting. You notice your triggers. You give yourself a moment. That moment changes everything.
3. Wiser decisions
When you know yourself, your choices become intentional. Not based on guilt, habit, or pressure but on the truth.
4. Faster personal growth
Every difficult experience becomes a teacher. You stop asking “Why me?” and start asking “What now?”
5. A more intentional life
You shift from autopilot to awareness. Your days start to reflect your values not just your to-do list.
6. A deeper sense of purpose
You begin to uncover what drives you. When you know your ‘why,’ life starts to feel more meaningful and less like you’re just going through the motions.
7. Resilience through setbacks
Self-reflection doesn’t stop challenges from coming. But it helps you stand back up with insight, not just bruises.
8. Creative thinking
You begin to notice patterns. New ways of seeing. New ways of solving. It opens the door to possibility.
9. Alignment with your long-term goals
When you check in with yourself, you can course-correct before drifting too far off. It keeps your energy focused on what truly matters.
10. Spiritual or inner connection
Whether it’s faith, intuition, or simply peace of mind, reflection brings you closer to something deeper than the day-to-day.
How To Begin A Self-Reflection Practice That Feels Right For You
You don’t need to escape to a retreat or overhaul your life to begin. Start small. Start gently. Start honestly. Here’s how:
1. Create space
Find a regular moment that’s just for you — mornings, evenings, lunch breaks. Protect it. Even 10–20 quiet minutes can make a difference.
2. Use simple prompts
Not sure where to begin? Let questions lead you in. Try these:
– What’s been on my mind lately?
– What decision am I putting off?
– What felt good this week?
3. Let your words be messy
Don’t edit. Don’t polish. This isn’t for anyone else. It’s your space to be real.
4. Stay consistent, not perfect
You’ll miss days. That’s okay. What matters is coming back to yourself, again and again.
5. Focus on one area at a time
Rather than trying to untangle your whole life, reflect on one part — your work, a relationship, a recent conversation. Go deeper, not wider.
6. Ask “why?” more than once
The first answer is rarely the full truth. Keep going. You’ll be surprised by what’s underneath.
7. End with one small action
What insight came up? Is there something you want to shift, say, or decide? One small step is enough.
8. Be creative with it
Write. Draw. Record voice notes. Use sticky notes or playlists. Reflection doesn’t have to look a certain way, it just has to feel like you.
Final Thoughts
Self-reflection isn’t about fixing yourself, it’s about meeting yourself. Where you are. As you are. And from there… choosing where to go next.
You don’t have to do this alone. If you're feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or simply ready to grow, then let's talk. Book your free discovery session today and start where you are. You’ll walk away with clarity, confidence, and a real plan to move forward.
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